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Ubuntu and Funerals (June 2012)

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I recently attended a funeral of an old classmate and cellmate in Mbekweni.   We were classmates in SimonHebe High school and we were cellmates in the Paarl Police station cells.  We found him in the cells with bandages and in pain from bullet wounds in 1985.  Two of those bullets are said to have been linked to his death a couple of weeks ago.  I got reminded of how one day tear-gas was shot into the cells and in the struggle to survive within those four walls forgot that there was a sickly person incarcerated with us.  We left him after after some time as we found him, with no proper medical care.  Here I was now at his funeral.
Like many funerals in Mbekweni this was some kind of a re-union for the township’s children.  It brought those who are still in the township and those who have left it together.   We were all brought up to take funerals serious.  Paying last respects to a person was and is still viewed as the least you can do for someone you know.  This is regardless of when last you’ve seen or spoken to the person.   People in Mbekweni burry each other regardless of social and economic standing.  We sometimes attend funerals even if the deceased is not personally known to you but because they are related to someone you know.  People pay their respects even beyond the day of the funeral itself.  From the day a person passes away there are services that take place in that house and there will always be people there.   This is one of those practices that I wish we never loose.  We have lost some aspect that I considered beautiful as part of Ubuntu.
 I grew up in a Mbekweni where there were street committees that ensured that when a person died donations will be asked from all houses to assist the bereaved family.  There would at times be threats that if you do not help the community will not assist if  you lose a family member. I do not recall this threat ever being carried out.  People gave their 50 cents per house without complaining.  Even if five people died in the township and it meant that you will have to deal with all requests to assist all there were no murmurs.  That was Ubuntu in practice.  We also got to know of people who passed on before they were buried.  I do not know why and how this beautiful practice was discontinued.  We are much poorer without it as it went beyond the money to showing a caring spirit.
 When a person passed away a bell would ring from the two or three churches that had such bells.  I did not know this to be limited to members of a specific denomination.   This is also no longer happening.   All these thoughts are triggered by a comment of a Pastor and his wife in this friend’s funeral.  This Pastoring couple felt the need to justify burying the deceased.  They stated that they are being criticized in the township for being always willing to burry people even if they were not members of their congregation. It bothered me that they felt such a need to explain as they are doing good work.  They had also assisted in burying a relative of mine and am grateful to them for that.  Mbekweni actually need more churches with the attitude of assisting families by conducting the service as many churches refuse to burry not only non-members but congregants who were not actively attending church.  Some are refused burial solely because they were not up to date in paying whatever money churches require members pay.   Churches miss an opportunity to demonstrate God’s love and kindness because the deceased failed in one or another kind of offering.  It is my belief that the Gospel has got to be preached with words and with deeds.  The many people who attend funerals in Mbekweni have to be convinced that the church is an institution they can trust to be there for them when they are in need. These are my views and I do not intend forcing them on other congregations but I strongly detest criticism of individuals and groupings that still practice ubuntu.

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